Happy Mom's Day

In honor of Mom's Day I'm posting a couple love notes that Jolie brought to me this week. One is addressed to a "special loving pretty mom." There's no better boost to one's self esteem than to discover that, in your child's eyes, you're "ocstrdanere", "ecksiding", "cool" and "intaresting".

Happy Mother's Day to all!

Is Jolie a Meanie?

Jolie started spring soccer several weeks ago and this morning I finally got it together to take some photos. Jolie played with the same team last fall. When the snow started melting and the pink dragons came back to practice this spring, it became apparent that Jolie had caught the competitive spirit. I don't know what happened during the dark cold winter but Jolie is now a competitor! She goes after the ball and she's even made a few goals. Last year and even last fall Jolie was, shall we say, less aggressive. I made the suggestion once that she go after the ball and get it away from the opposing team. I'll never foret her reply, "Mommy!" "That's kind of mean!" That's when I realized that competitive sports may not be her thing.

Now I'm wondering... maybe the competitive spirit can be acquired.

Does This Look Like the Face of a Trouble Maker?

We got an unusual phone call today. It was from Jolie's teacher. It wasn't about helping with the class field trip or my offer to donate juice for "Dads and Donuts". It was about a problem. I was shocked. So was she.

It seems that Jolie was caught in a situation in the girls bathroom where she and two other girls were goofing around with a large quantity of toilet paper. Mrs. J. had gone looking for them as they'd been away from class for too long. She discovered the girls... and the toilet paper. It was one of the other girls who'd been the mastermind but Jolie was guilty by association.

Mrs. J was as shocked as I was. Jolie has a reputation of being an ANGEL. I guess we can blame it on peer pressure.

Frontrunner

This week Dan's parents have been visiting from Virgina. Yesterday we all took an exciting trip on our new commuter rail train, Frontrunner. We rode it to Salt Lake and then made our way to Temple Square to see the gorgeous spring flowers. We had dinner at the Garden restaurant which offers a beautiful view of the city, and then we made our way back home. It was a fun excursion even though there were four million people riding the train with us. I enjoyed seeing the completion of the commuter rail project as it was in the early planning stage when I worked for UTA seven years ago. It was also exciting for Gavin as we've been watching the practice runs for months and talking about the day when we'd finally get to ride.

Mia at Four Months

Mia is so happy! She spends her days smiling and playing. She's also starting to use her hands. If I put her teething beads into her little fists she can raise them to her mouth and chew for a few minutes. She also loves to kick when she's excited. I'm usually greeted first thing in the morning by a smiling, kicking baby.

I should say that I'm greeted IF Tristan doesn't go in and get her out of bed first. Mia has definitely assimilated well into our family. Tristan likes to see her before he leaves for school so he takes any grunt or peep he hears on the baby monitor as an invitation to get her up. It's very sweet but sometimes creates stress for me as Dan has long since left for work and I'm always very busy getting the kids ready for school, making lunches, finishing homework, trying to appease Gavin "I want oatmeal!" "I hate Wonder Pets!" "I'm DOOONE!" (from the bathroom)... and ofcourse Mia wants to eat the minute she's awake. If only I had ten hands.

We're still not completely sure about Mia's eye color. It's still a mix of blue and brown (somehow I have a feeling they're going to end up being brown.) Ofcourse she looks like Dan but more and more people are telling me that she looks like Jolie. I really see her resemblance to Jolie in her eyes and nose. Mia was featured as the first grade show-and-tell a few weeks ago. Jolie was thrilled to finally be able to show Mia off around school. I arrived with Mia a few minutes early while Jolie was in the lunch room. I was immediately swarmed by little girls (I think a few boys, too.) She was the envy of the class during show-and-tell.

I think Mia is fascinated by Gavin more than anyone else. Last week I was sitting at the computer in our office while Dan was holding Mia. Gavin jumped up and tapped Mia on the arm and she laughed! We weren't certain that she'd truly laughed so we asked Gavin to do it again. Sure enough, Gavin was responsible for Mia's first laughs. (Makes sense... it must be pretty hilarious to watch a miniture person jump and run around all day long, not to mention hit people with swords, hulk gloves and light sabers and climb all over everything).

**It makes me a little sad to write this today because Gavin has been very sick. He's been running a very high fever (over 104) since Monday and is not at all himself. I'm sad to see my usual active, happy little buddy so sad and lethargic. I hope he's back to is usual self very soon**

More Brotherly Love

A couple mornings ago Gavin came into my room very early. This actually happens quite commonly, but that's a whole other subject. He climbed into bed with me, laid quietly for a while (as if in deep thought) and then asked, "Mommy, when I get big, can my name be Tristan?"

What a sweet moment. I've filed it away in my subconsciousness so that I can recall it each time one of my children is poking, teasing, fighting, tattle-telling, bickering, or hitting one of my other children.

It was a very sweet moment; and yes, I think of it about a hundred times a day.

I've been tagged

by my friend, Melinda. I'm supposed to tell you 7 interesting things about myself and then tag some of my friends.

1) I'm double-jointed. I can bend my thumb backwards and nearly touch my forearm. I can also hyper-extend my elbows and knees.

2) I was an exchange student in France during college. I spent one summer in the Loire Valley and the next with my French sister, Sophie, in Grenoble (French Alps). I also minored in French.

3) I was once hypnotized on stage. This was also during college... wow, those were the days.

4) I have several dozen eggs in my freezer. I was able to get them for .19 a dozen because I had coupons that coincided with a sale (long story). When I brought home 12 dozen eggs Dan looked at me like I was looney. When I announced that I planned to freeze them (yes, in the shells) his expression went from puzzled to panicked.

5) I rarely have time for TV but I do love my TiVo. I have the entire Masterpiece Theater Jane Austen series recorded right now but I've somehow been unable to watch any of it. It seems that when I do have a bit of time to watch TV, I'm too brain-dead to watch Jane Austen. I usually end up watching Good Things Utah or Larry King or something else that requires zero brain power.

6) As a child I dreamed of becoming a flight attendant. This seemed like the most glamorous job in the world. Looking back, much of the allure seems to have been connected to the uniform. Remember the day when a flight attendant wore a navy suit, a white blouse, high heels, and most importantly, the elegant silk scarf? Somehow it just doesn't seem right for the woman serving my drink to be wearing a golf shirt and khaki shorts.

7) Finally, I've made it to the age of 30-something without learning to drive a stick shift. I tried a couple times but those attempts just ended in frustration (and a long line of cars behind me at a stop light).

So there you have it, seven interesting facts about yours truly.

Now... I'm tagging Jill and Robin.

Look What Mia Found

Mia has been trying to get her fist since the day she was born. I'm pretty sure she sucked on it in-utero but since she came out she hasn't been coordinated enough to keep her hand to her mouth. Well, yesterday she suceeded and look what she found!

Mia is our first thumb-sucker. Tristan and Jolie both loved their passy but I think the thumb is going to be great! No searching for it in the dark after it falls out in the middle of the night... no picking it up off the dirty floor. It doesn't calm her all the time but it's certainly nice to have a baby who can try to soothe herself.

Don't you also love the way she shoves it in her mouth all the way to where her thumb joins her hand?

Ramblings of an Unkempt New Mom

One of the difficulties of having a new baby is that you constantly look haggard, sleep deprived, pudgy and shlumpy. At least I do.

Today was a small triumph as I was able to shower AND wash and blow dry my hair. Mia took a long nap this morning and Gavin somehow found it within his busy little self to sit and watch TWO episodes of Diego. Tales of animal rescue must have been quite enticing as Gavin rarely watches anything on TV.

I was looking and smelling pretty fine, if I may say so myself.

Unfortunately, my pleasant look and odor only lasted a few hours as Mia vomitted curdled milk down the front of my blouse and ALL over my hair.

She was smiling when she did it. I wont hold it against her. I hope you wont either, if you happeed to cross paths with me today.

I hope Diego's doing something exciting tomorrow morning...

The Love of a Brother

Tonight while I was in the kitchen making dinner I happened to glance over at Mia who was having a content little swing. It seems that Gavin decided to share his light sabers with her. These are Gavin's most coveted possessions right now (not to mention the root of most of the trouble he finds himself in on a daily basis). He had them extended all the way so that the ends were resting on the floor. He was talking to Mia in a high-pitched voice, calling her "sweetheart" and saying something about her "guns".

Awwww... how sweet. Nothing says "brotherly love" more than the sharing of deadly weapons.

Oh, and Mia's reaction? She seemed quite honored. In fact, she was working pretty hard at getting her mouth on them. She was looking at Gavin with wide-eyed wonder. I think she understood the significance of the gesture given that she's watched him carry these things around and threaten people with them for the past few weeks.

Ok, ok... I'm not too proud to admit that he's even hit a few people with them, including my visiting teacher, but that's a whole other post...

Crockpot Lasagne

It's rare for me to post a recipe but I need to share this one. Did you know you can make lasagne in your crock pot? I was skeptical but it turned out great! More importantly, it was easy. No boiling noodles or waiting for your oven to preheat while your kids are foraging around in the pantry, telling you they're hungry. I should have taken a photo when I made this last night but I had some of those hungry children to attend to.

CROCKPOT LASAGNA

8 uncooked lasagna noodles
1 pound ground beef
1 tsp. (or more) Italian seasoning
28-ounce jar spaghetti sauce
1/3 cup water
4-oz. can sliced mushrooms, optional
15 oz. low-fat ricotta cheese (can also use cottage cheese)
2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese

Brown ground beef, drain. Stir in Italian seasoning. Break noodles into thirds. Place half in bottom of greased crockpot. Spread half of ground beef mixture over noodles in crockpot.

On top of beef, layer 1/2 of sauce, 1/2 of water, 1/2 of mushrooms (opt.), 1/2 of ricotta, and 1/2 of mozerella cheese. Repeat all layers.

Cover. Cook for 5 hours on low.

Pinewood Derby

Last night was Tristan's pinewood derby. He and Grandpa have been working on his car for several weeks. It's a good thing that Grandpa took this project on because Dan and I have been rather overwhelmed with the day-to-day and I don't think we would have got his car built in time. For those unfamiliar with cub scouts, the boys start with a plain block of wood and carve it into a car, paint it, put the axles and wheels on, and then the best of the best do all sorts of strategic things to their car so that it is FAST (weights, graphite, etc.) It was a very exciting event. Tristan's car was pretty fast.

On a sidenote, the scoring of the cars ended up being rather mysterious (dare I say a sham?) It's been bothering me all morning. Somehow the slower cars ended up winning the awards. The guy who was scoring the cars was using an Excel spreadsheet and I honestly think his formula was messed up. Tristan noticed this as well (that the slower cars won the awards) and he was upset as we were walking home. I tried to brush it off with him but I find myself in a dilemna. Is it better to let it go or should I be the crybaby parent who looks into the matter? I think my sense of justice may prevail.

**Tristan's car is the red and silver one, third from the right on the bottom row**

... And they're off!

Ever been to the race track? This photo reminds me of Del Mar...

This year our annual egg hunt was held at Grandpa and Grandma's park. Lisa usually heads this up but she was occupied with other things. Grandma was in charge of hiding the eggs. The kids' favorite eggs were those with special messages in them: a sleep-over at Grandpa and Grandma's house with ice cream sundaes, your favorite dinner made by mom, a craft day at Grandma's, a bow shooting session with Grandpa and an hour at the park with Grandma. The candy was popular as well, but Grandma and I were surprised to see the kids ditching the candy eggs and looking for the ones with the papers in them. I guess the parenting books are right, attention and time is always the best reward.

I colored eggs with the kids this year. I realized that I hadn't done this for a while, I think it might have been Gavin's first time (strange how we forget the details after a kid or two). Ofcourse things digressed toward the end, there was dye everywhere and they resorted to using their fingers instead of the hygenically designed dipping utensils. Thank goodness for newspaper and soap!

My Basket's Better Than Yours!

Wow, somebody sure knows what our favorite things are! Look at this beautiful basket from Nana and Papa. There's something for everyone here. Dan claimed the gourmet jelly beans, I went for petit fours, the kids had some of everything, and I hid most of the rest of it so we don't all turn into fat rabbits ourselves.

I promise...

Some cute Easter photos to come. I'm using my better judgement and NOT staying up til 1 a.m. to do this tonight. But tomorrow, I promise!

What the ???

This morning I was putting some things away in the nursery and found this. It seems that Tristan is doing science experiments around the house again. I don't know that for sure but it fits his profile more than anyone else who lives here. Somehow I just don't see Jolie as a bacteriological scientist. These are petri dishes and inside there are cotton swabs that I use to clean Jolie's ear piercings. They're sitting on top of the heat register in Mia's room. I'm very interested to get to the bottom of this...

Open Secrets

While we're on the subject of books, I wanted to make a recommendation to anyone who's looking for a good read. Open Secrets by Alice Munro is a collection of short stories. She's an amazing story teller, I really enjoyed this one.

Jolie's an Author!

Over the past few weeks I've been hearing a lot about Jolie's masterpiece. I had no idea it was going to be so enlightening, especially her opinion about the food we ate while we were at Disney World. Following is an excerpt from her book.

Three Wishes

Today over lunch, a friend recounted her kids' three wishes. She has a book where she writes all this stuff down and they love to hear the funny things they said in past years. (Ofcourse I told her she should start blogging).

So tonight Lara inspiried me to grant three wishes to everyone at OUR dinner table:

Jolie
"I wish we could have recess all day."
"I wish Mommy could be President." (huh?)
"I wish we could watch Spongebob."

Gavin
"I wish I could be a Rescue Hero."
"I wish I could fly."
"I wish I had a Rescue Hero toy."

Tristan (who took the longest to respond and really thought this through)
"I wish I could be a Jazz player" (which he said would also fulfill his wish of being rich and having everything he wanted).
"I wish there were no such thing as homework."
"I wish I couldn't get in trouble and Jolie and Gavin could."

Mommy
"I wish there were no such thing as housework."
"I wish I could scrapbook/quilt/read/play all day."
"I wish I could be healthy and strong and feel good every day."

Daddy
"Good weather"
"Less polution"
"World peace"
oh... and after I commented on how selfish the rest of us had been and how altruistic he was... he admitted that he wished for brainier beauty contestants. But now I can't figure out if that wish is for the betterment of society or if there's a selfish motivation behind this.

Anyway, if you see any genies please send them in our direction.

My Likeness

I know it's stepping on the wild side for me to customize my layout. I spent this evening after dinner lying in bed while creating my avatar. Dan was really sweet to offer his laptop while he finished dinner with the kids and cleaned up the kitchen. My leg was hurting like crazy and I just couldn't go through the last half of dinner. Anyone who's dined with us knows that to be the part where Dan and I beg and plead with our kids to eat their food and keep their bums in their seats. Tonight the controversy was over the tomatoes in the red clam sauce (linguini) and the mushrooms, tomatoes and avacado in the salad.

My solitude was short-lived. The kids were quickly in my room giving input about my avatar. Gavin argued for goth makeup ("mommy, pick the scarry face") and Jolie had me trying on all sorts of interesting clothing. Somehow tube tops and mini skirts just didn't seem right for me. Tristan was mostly concerned with getting my hair color right.

So what do you think? Before you answer, realize that it's harder than you might think to create a two-dimensional likeness of yourself. Especially when the options DON'T include worn-out, sweatpants-wearing, milk-and-baby-pooped-stained, limping, circles-under-the-eyes, mommy... types.

An Update

Tomorrow will be one week since my surgery and things are going well. I'm slowly getting my life back. I'm still not back to normal but at least my entire existance isn't consumed with pain management. I have my incision and some residual pain from the compressed nerve but I'm told that will eventually go away. I have to abide by some restrictions over the next 6-8 weeks, mainly no lifting over 10 lbs. I'm also not supposed to sit for more than 10 minutes at a time but I'm finding that to be easy with four kids to take care of.

The main challenge now is taking care of Mia. She's about 11 lbs. so I'm ok carrying her. I can't bend over to lift her from her crib or swing or go from sitting to standing with her. It's a little tricky but we've found some ways to work around my restrictions. The hardest thing is that I'm still not able to go anywhere with the kids because I can't lift Mia in her carseat. That's keeping me close to home and it makes driving Tristan's carpool impossible unless someone is here to leave Mia with.

Yesterday I drove for the first time in almost 6 weeks! It was surreal. It reminded me of when I returned home after spending several weeks in Europe. Everything seemed new. I'd forgotten the presets on my stereo, the DJ on my favorite radio station seemed like a long lost friend. I felt like a tourist as I drove through Kaysville. Really, it was weird. The strangest part was the realization that the outside world was exactly the same but that I had changed. Who could have known that a trip to Albertsons could cause such an epiphany?

Finally, I need to let everyone know that I am, in fact, at home and not in a Utah County rehab facility with Lindsay Lohan and Kirsten Dunst. I know there were many among my friends and family who were concerned that my heavy reliance on oxycontin would lead me there. At least MOST of them were subtle in their concern and didn't actually ask me outright how many pills I had taken that day... and then call me the next day and ask the same question. No, I'm not making this up. I have been thinking, though, since my medical bills have already started rolling in... I could probably sell my remaining oxycontin on the street and pay a lot of my medical bills. Would that make me a bad person?

Our Doll

I know this blog is becoming a shrine to Mia and you'd hardly know we had any other children, but I couldn't resist posting this photo. At two months she's starting to fatten up. She also loves to smile and study everything in her line of sight. She spends more time awake and ofcourse she loves to be held, walked around, and talked to. She has also discovered her voice and loves to coo at us and vocalize while she's nursing.

Yesterday Mia was long overdue for a bath. I asked Jolie to go upstairs and get the bathtub, a towel, washcloth and a clean outfit to put on her. After being gone for what seemed like a long time, Jolie came down with all the bathing essentials and the most impressive assortment of baby clothing you can imagine. She had a dress from Mia's closet which we've never put on her (mostly because we've never taken her anywhere), a onesie, some velvety shoes, a headband, and a pair of frilly socks. Dan and I looked at each other and told Jolie we were thinking more like jammies. I promised Jolie that someday she and I would dress Mia to the nines, but for now a nice pair of comfortable PJs would do.

Scalpel, please...

Well, I'm scheduled to have surgery on Thursday. I never thought I'd actually look forward to being sliced open but I am. The mylogram showed a pretty bad herniation of my disk at L5 S1 (what did I tell you?) which explains the horrid pain. I basically have disk fragments and inflamation sitting on my sciatic nerve. I talked to a woman from church who's had the same injury and the same surgery and she compares the pain to what you get when you bump your funny bone and get that sharp, almost electric nerve pain in your arm. Well, that's what this is except is starts at the lower back and goes all the way down the back of my butt and leg all the way to my pinky toe. All the time. It's horrid. So you can see why I'd do anything, including being sliced open, to have it end.

I was going to try to report some news off this subject but I can't think of any. This is pretty much our life right now. I'm going to get out and party big time when it's over. I never thought that something simple like running an errand or going for a walk would seem like such a privilege. I can't wait to get back to my normal life.

Starting to Thaw

The sun has been out the last couple of days. We haven't had snow for a whole 6 days! I took this photo a couple of weeks ago to show how much snow we had. I haven't been outside for a while but I think it's starting to melt off.

I had the mylograph and CT on Wednesday. It wasn't pleasant but I got through it. They had me lie face-down on a table while a radiologist guided a needle into my spine. They injected contrast (dye) into my spinal fluid so that the structures would show up better on the CT.

The worst part of the whole deal was that I had to lie flat for the rest of the day because there's a good chance of getting a spinal headache after people mess with your spinal fluid. I hadn't counted on this, as Tristan's drama performance was that evening. I wasn't sure how I was going to go as I've been house-bound since my injury, but I was determined to go and at least see his number. It was a really big deal to him. It was very dissapointing to have to stay home. Mia and I layed on the family room floor while everyone else went to the performance. Fun, fun.

Tristan didn't give me a hard time when I told him I couldn't come, but I happened to see his journal entry he next day. His teacher must have asked the class to journal how they felt about their performance. He wrote, "I felt good because we did a good job. My grandparents said 'good job!'. I felt sad because my mom couldn't come." It broke my heart when I read that.

Mia's Smiles

I'm going in for a mylegram and CT on my spine today. They'll inject dye into my spine and then do a cat scan to see what's going on. I wish they'd just take my word for it... that I've ruptured my disk (L5 S1). I'm not looking forward to another catheter in my back but I'll do whatever it takes at this point.

These photos are of Mia's recent smiles. She's very happy and that's the one thing that's getting me through this. At least I know that all the pain and suffering was for a good reason.

Blessing Day

Today was Mia's blessing day. It was a very special day and an especially bright spot after a couple of difficult weeks for me. Dan blessed Mia in our home. Brother Brown from our bishoprick was here as well as my family. Mia looked angelic in the beautiful dress that my mom made for Jolie six years ago. It was a little big, though. I think that Mia is probably about the same size at 7 weeks as Jolie was at birth (nearly 10 lbs.)

Laid Up

I'm afraid I'm writing from bed this morning. I brought my laptop in here several days ago after I did something horrid to my back. I had back surgery a couple years ago and I'm sorry to say that my symptoms resemble what I was experiencing back then. I'm pretty sure I've re-ruptured the disk. As with most other things, only someone who's been through it can truly understand the horrid pain I've been in the last week and a half.

The good news is that I've been seeing some improvement through a combination of rest, anti-inflamatories, narcotic pain killers and physical therapy. I was amazed to find out that I can still nurse Mia on these drugs. That's a huge blessing because I don't know if I could make it without them and I would have been VERY sad if I'd had to stop nursing her at only 6 weeks old.

I'v gotten to where I can cope here at home but I'm not really able to go anywhere because I'm not able to drive. Sitting causes excruciating pain. The only time I've been out of the house in the last ten days is for physical therapy and I've had to be driven by someone, plus someone to look after the kids while I'm gone so it's quite an undertaking.

I think HF is trying to teach me patience and empathy. I never thought I'd have to go through something like this again. Did I not learn the lesson the first time around?